If I had a dollar for every time a guy I just met at a bar said “You’re so cool. I don’t ever meet girls like you”
I would have two dollars.
A losing battle
Jason (not his real name but I called him that for a while): So are you a runner?
Shonali: That's very nice of you to say but... what?
Jason: Your legs are very toned
Dana: HAHAHAHAH HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA
Shonali: but thanks.
Jason: ... So you just work out?
Jason: Why not? Exercise is so good for you!
Shonali: I mean.... maybe I'd start if I got fat. I don't know.
Birds of a Feather
Shonali: Then he asked if he could kiss me.
Lizi: Oh, they all do that.
Shonali: It's pretty gross that you know that.
After Lizi let slip the name of the blog to a promising subject of it, I needed to see how searchable we were. All clear.
All I want for Christmas is Kael
today when i was meeting with my team
my stomach made this long, high-pitched squeaking noise that was just so obviously a fart that had died
and before i could even figure out how to do damage control one of my teammates was like “time to eat?”
NO, BUT THANK YOU FOR THE HELP
Stop crying jellybean tears and get out of my apartment
Lizi: i wonder if there was a follow-up to FOTC "albie the racist dragon"
"JUDGEY the staunchly not-girlfriend"
because it would be me.
you can have the bubblegum pie
Shonali: "i can't believe you brought over pie on the first date, this is disgustingly forward and i won't have any"
Lizi: except instead of "and suddenly ablie wasn't racist anymore"
Lizi: "and suddenly Judgey couldn't stand him anymore"
"also he had a woefully small penis"
Shonali: NOPE. blogging.
You should trannyscribe all your whories in a sliary using a peen so you can publice them for next slaugust as hotivation for us. Not hatin, just squirtin.